


Choice

by starsoverhead



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-27
Updated: 2012-07-27
Packaged: 2017-11-10 20:49:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 914
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/470539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starsoverhead/pseuds/starsoverhead
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A choice that will change Spencer's life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Choice

The papers in front of him would change his life.

It wasn’t the first time the realisation had come to him. Far from it. Every time he glanced at the official Times New Roman with the perfect and pure legalese sprawled out across the page, he got a twisting knot of pure apprehension in his stomach. This was such an important decision. What if it wasn’t the right thing? He knew what he felt, but what one felt wasn’t always the perfect basis for a decision.

With a sigh, he rubbed a hand across his eyes and stood, leaving the papers there on the coffee table as he went back toward the bathroom. He needed to at least get out of his contacts before he ended up rubbing them into his own corneas irreparably. More than that, it was a welcome distraction from the whirl of his thoughts.

What if he signed those papers? Even worse, what if he didn’t?

Spencer stared at himself in the mirror once the contacts were thrown away, looking into his own eyes with the usual criticism - too light. His eyes were too light, his hair was too light. His skin was as pale as always. Only the circles beneath his eyes could be called too dark. He sighed as he slid his glasses onto his face. He’d not been sleeping well for ages, with this decision always lurking in the corner of his mind.

Today had been something of a breaking point. He’d gone in to work only to have Hotch stare at him, call him into his office, and ask if he’d decided yet. When he’d said no, Hotch had ordered him to leave and not come back until his choice was made, one way or the other. He’d not had an option. All he could do was pick up his bag and leave so he could pore over these papers and mentally torment himself for another day.

He knew what Hotch wanted him to do. What Hotch had been subtly pressuring him to do with those looks, those moments when he’d glance up to his boss’s office and Hotch would look down at him with that inscrutable, weighty gaze. He knew what words passed between them in those moments. Hotch was tired of waiting for him to make the right choice, what with everything that had happened.

It was as he was staring into the refrigerator that he heard the key in the door and looked up at the clock in stun. That much time had passed? His heart leapt up into his throat as he practically sprinted into the living room, but too late. Already, someone else was looking over the vital paperwork that he’d carelessly left on the table.

“What’s this?”

The question struck home, hitting that knot of apprehension and pulling it even tighter. This wasn’t how he was supposed to break the news. Very consciously, he bit the edge of his tongue before giving in and walking over to the sofa and seating himself, feeling more than seeing the cushion beside him sink with a person’s weight.

“It’s… It’s something we’ve been talking about for a long time, and I’ve been thinking about it a lot today.”

“Is that why you were here all day? Instead of at work?”

“Right,” Spencer nodded, and looked over into a pair of brown eyes that he thought were just the right shade. He knew, right then, what he had to do. “What do you think about it? What do you think I should do?”

The smile he got made him smile in return. “I want you to do it.”

“You do?”

“Uh-huh.” And without any more warning than a nod, he was suddenly the recipient of a tight and obviously heartfelt hug that he had to reciprocate, even with tears standing in his eyes. With a reaction like that, he had to do it. And the decision felt perfect - even if it also made him feel stupid. How could he have waited so long when he knew the answer all along?

“Then I will,” he said, smiling all the more when the hug tightened. Spencer looked up, past the body in his arms, as he heard the quiet beeps of the alarm system being armed. Up to a warm smile and the real reason why he always thought that shade of brown was perfect. It was a shade father and son shared. “I love you, Jack,” he whispered. “You and your dad.”

“And after you sign those papers,” Aaron murmured as he sat down beside them, “you’ll be his dad, too.”

He’d be a father. An adoptive father, but a father. So many things were suddenly coming clear. It didn’t matter if he wasn’t the perfect father. What mattered was that he loved Jack and he would do everything in his power to be the best possible father he could be. Even if he stumbled sometimes, it was only human.

He lifted a hand to stroke over Jack’s hair and kissed his son-to-be’s forehead. “It’s the best job in the world. And I hope it’s a lifetime contract.”

“You’d better believe it.” With a seldom-seen smile, Aaron leaned over to kiss his cheek, arms wrapping around both Spencer and Jack, and Spencer leaned his head against Aaron’s jaw. This was everything he’d needed. A place where he fit, where he was wanted, and now it was his. Times New Roman wasn’t quite as intimidating anymore.


End file.
